Interdependence

Stephen Covey defines maturity as interdependence --- this is when you need other people, & have cultivated nurturing, supportive relationships with people in your life. Independence, as compared to dependence (totally relying on others for your needs) and independence (relying on one's self). I used to see independence as the ideal, and look at myself as very self-reliant and standing on my own. This is good for awhile, for you learn to trust in yourself and in your instincts. Who to better know what's best for you than your inner voice? The older I get however, I realize how much more effective and how much more important other people are in life. I can't totally rely on myself, for I am human, & not superwoman after all. I do need friends, and family, to share my dreams & triumphs, as well as my sorrows and tears. Slowly I am learning to do this. Where once before, I would keep all my cards close to my chest, & not disclose my dreams & aspirations, I find myself sharing my goals and ambitions to people, still with a bit of trepidation, but still daring to share them nevertheless. Telling people about what makes me happy and what makes me sad, makes the experience more real somewhat. We all need witnesses to our lives, and people to share in our triumphs. I for one, am still very secretive about my problems, but have begun disclosing (& crying!) in the past year to friends, and even strangers who've become friends: about my failed marriage, my angst about finding intimacy and love. And I have begun to come out of my shell, & share with people, even with strangers, about my ambitions: joining the Triathlon, & now joining the International Contest. When once before I'd be scared to do so, for fear of having the fates play with me & snatch my fondest wishes, I dare to not believe in luck, but have faith that dreams do come true. If I earnestly try, and seek help and advice from friends. And asking for help was always one of my weaknesses. I guess I am growing up & becoming more mature after all.
And to thank God for a growing list of friends:
* Niel, whose always been there through the years. Who would have thought we'd end up being such close friends?
* Finding old friends once again (Jercyl, Jingle)
* New friends (Edmund, people at work)
* Maintaining friends (Aboitiz Toastmasters, Timbukto, Lexmark friends: Raniza, Eboy, Joan B.)
There are still other friends who I know would wish and pray for the best for me (Ateneo barkada, Toastmaster friends, other good friends). And learning to open up & find new friends along the way (Monet, Tootz, Boom, Khris, countless others)
That old song is true after all:
" People, people who need people
Are the luckiest people in the world" !!!