A close friend of mine cried on his way home last night. After trying his luck once again on the perilous road to love. I can only commiserate and sympathize. I know how it feels. To suffer the pangs of unrequited love. Heck, not even love. Just the thought of not being given a chance.
Taking a chance is always difficult, and no one likes the sting of rejection. Even when there are so many reasons: its him, not you; it may be that he's unavailable; it may be that he needs someone else, not necessarily you; or that he has other priorities at the moment. Whatever it is, you have been rejected. And its hard not to take it personally. And you start asking yourself: what is about me that is so difficult to love? I mean what's there not to like? I remember Meredith Gray from Gray's Anatomy saying: "Choose me. Love me". As if one could beg the other person to love you.
Heck, it gets even worse. Let's say you do get lucky enough, to actually have the other person like you. Sparks fly & the music begins. Then the dance starts... trying to get to know another person once again. I have another friend who once remarked: "Its hard. Going through another round of questions. From the simple & the mundane, what's your favorite color? To the things that matter: what are your values and aspirations in life". Having to share your life history with someone, tell the same stories all over again. Tiptoeing and putting your best foot forward once more, you try to be real and honest, but not too honest else he sees how wild and unpredictable you can be, for he might get turned off & change his mind. The awkward silences, the trying to guess what the other person is thinking, to seeing if there is a future to this beginning after all. And you hope, that even if you try to present your best face; that he has the eyes, the sensitivity to see beyond, & see the holes in your mask. That he even has the interest, the real desire to get to know the real you.
Starting over sure is tough. And there are no clear instructions, no clear guidelines on how to go through it all. Some people like to play games, to take the upper hand. Someone once said that its all about who has the power in a relationship, & one has to always play it cool & not to let the other person have control over you. So you play it nonchalant, & you shrug it off, & pretend that you always have other options, not just him. I don't play games however, but have always been the girl who has her heart on her sleeve. I don't like playing it cool, for if you can't take gamble on love, what is there to risk for? Not that I am ready to play the love game once again. But just stay in the game. The one that men and women play.
So don't play it cool. Make the first move. Take a chance. Even if you do get hurt, or get humiliated, or end up being called a fool. Life is too short to have regrets. And you may never know, you could get really, really lucky after all.
Taking a chance is always difficult, and no one likes the sting of rejection. Even when there are so many reasons: its him, not you; it may be that he's unavailable; it may be that he needs someone else, not necessarily you; or that he has other priorities at the moment. Whatever it is, you have been rejected. And its hard not to take it personally. And you start asking yourself: what is about me that is so difficult to love? I mean what's there not to like? I remember Meredith Gray from Gray's Anatomy saying: "Choose me. Love me". As if one could beg the other person to love you.
Heck, it gets even worse. Let's say you do get lucky enough, to actually have the other person like you. Sparks fly & the music begins. Then the dance starts... trying to get to know another person once again. I have another friend who once remarked: "Its hard. Going through another round of questions. From the simple & the mundane, what's your favorite color? To the things that matter: what are your values and aspirations in life". Having to share your life history with someone, tell the same stories all over again. Tiptoeing and putting your best foot forward once more, you try to be real and honest, but not too honest else he sees how wild and unpredictable you can be, for he might get turned off & change his mind. The awkward silences, the trying to guess what the other person is thinking, to seeing if there is a future to this beginning after all. And you hope, that even if you try to present your best face; that he has the eyes, the sensitivity to see beyond, & see the holes in your mask. That he even has the interest, the real desire to get to know the real you.
Starting over sure is tough. And there are no clear instructions, no clear guidelines on how to go through it all. Some people like to play games, to take the upper hand. Someone once said that its all about who has the power in a relationship, & one has to always play it cool & not to let the other person have control over you. So you play it nonchalant, & you shrug it off, & pretend that you always have other options, not just him. I don't play games however, but have always been the girl who has her heart on her sleeve. I don't like playing it cool, for if you can't take gamble on love, what is there to risk for? Not that I am ready to play the love game once again. But just stay in the game. The one that men and women play.
So don't play it cool. Make the first move. Take a chance. Even if you do get hurt, or get humiliated, or end up being called a fool. Life is too short to have regrets. And you may never know, you could get really, really lucky after all.
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